I went night cycling with my brothers again.
So fucking rad.
The wind in my hair, the distance we covered, the cool night air, the long stretch of road in front of us, not a single other person in sight. Night cycling is probably our new favourite past time. You cycle together, but you're allowed time alone to think too. At night. At the peaceful beach. All good things in one.
I just don't like the reasons we've been escaping to the beach lately, though. I mean, i like the idea of night cycling with my brothers but i hate the reasons why we've had to do it.
My older brother suggested it in the first place to get us (his younger siblings) out of the house, to protect us, shelter us from any emotional harm. My adik may not realise it and think its just a fun activity with his brother and sister but i am old enough to understand my brother's motives. He really does love us so much. He really cares so much about me and adik.
Sometimes i think, maybe God gave me my abang so that he can step in and be the real man of the family wherever my dad has failed; So that he can be there to support and guide his younger siblings the right way in place of our parents. I love my brothers so much. No matter how screwed up things get, i'll always have them to turn to. I'll always have them to talk to. And we can be there for each other, advice each other. Because we cannot depend on our parents for that for most times. Usually, its the parents in a family who have a tougher duty to keep everyone together, keep everything from falling apart and be there for support and the glue for when their children bicker and fight. For my family? I'd think its the other way round. And i have my brother to thank for that. Without him, we'd all crumble and fall.
He is truly, my guiding light.
Thank God for my brothers to keep me holding on. Syukur Alhamdulillah.