Songs that make me feel so at peace. I think i've gotten used to being all alone all the time. It consumes me sometimes. But otherwise, i'm okay with it and i've come to terms with the fact that I can't always have it my way in life.
Yeah, i have a pretty weird family structure. But i'm glad things are like this sometimes. I like being introverted and individualistic and independent. It makes me feel free. And i like the fact that i've got all this time to myself, to think and reflect, figure myself out.
I like blasting good music in my room, while blogging or writing or reading within these four walls. I like my green walls, my purple bedsheets, the photos of people i love on my wall, the used record i just put up on my wall, my collection of CDs, the accessories i hang up. It makes me feel like me. Like i've got no one to hide from when i'm alone in my room. Sometimes, i play random tunes on the piano or pick up the guitar because i like the feeling when i get totally lost in my music.
Yes, i like bands. Punk and emo bands, the playlist i shared with an almost friend about a year ago. But sometimes, indie music makes me feel more like me. These kinds of lightweight tunes kind of unpack my inner thoughts and emotions, unpacks me. I like that feeling.
I've been feeling pretty good these past few days. Smiling a lot more. Being kinder to people around me because i feel like i owe it to them to be happy. And sometimes this pretence turns into an actual reality as if my pretending to be happy turns into actual happiness. And i like that feeling too. I can do so many things when i'm happy.
Being alone makes me happy. Being with close friends and family makes me happy too. I guess it's all in the mind.
They say, If you want to be happy, BE.